How Micro-Disconnecting Helped My Partner and Me Reconnect

We are busy professionals living in a world of churning chaos. Honestly, the beginning of the year made me want to put my head in the sand. With the election, the discussions, the looming changes, the job market, and everyone’s take on the economy, I was sick with anxiety.

I am lucky to be in a loving relationship full of imperfections. However, this also means we tend to become complacent during tumultuous times. We fall into familiar patterns of overworking, followed by doom-scrolling, and spending our nights on our phones next to each other without really connecting. Yet, in some strange way, we started considering this “quality time.”

This is, in fact, not quality time.

The Shift: Less Time, More Meaning

I realized I’d rather spend less time together on a daily basis but make that time more intentional. Instead of sitting next to each other, mindlessly scrolling, we decided to pursue our individual passions during the week. Then, once a month, we’d schedule a digital disconnect—a time to be fully present with each other without distractions.

The idea came after a ski trip we had scheduled months prior. As avid snowboarders, we were excited for our time in Wolf Creek, CO. Steep and deep powder was the plan. However, we arrived during one of the driest seasons the area had seen. We debated whether to get some work done and use the trip as a change of scenery for productivity.

WHAT? No. Stop.

We’d had small arguments about our lack of quality time, and here was our chance to address it. So, we unplugged and leaned in. Instead of checking emails and responding to notifications, we had deep, unfiltered conversations about our personal and professional struggles, fears, and dreams for our future together—conversations that often got lost in the noise of our usual routine. It helped that we were in a neutral environment, exploring, laughing, and experiencing new things.

The Benefits of Micro-Disconnecting

1. Genuine Connection—Without digital distractions, we could see each other, listen deeply, and engage in meaningful conversations that wouldn’t have happened over a screen.
2. Reigniting Curiosity – By being fully present, we rediscovered the little things that made us fall in love in the first place—the quirks, the inside jokes, the shared adventures.
3. Reduced Stress & Anxiety—Disconnecting from the constant digital noise creates space for mental clarity, helping us process stress more healthily.
4. More Appreciation, Less Obligation – Our time together felt less like a default setting and more like something we actively chose, which made it more valuable.
5. Increased Productivity Elsewhere – Ironically, allowing us to disconnect one weekend a month made our workweeks more productive because we returned refreshed and recharged.

Bringing It Full Circle

We realized we didn’t need to force quality time into our jam-packed schedules. Instead, we made our moments together feel richer by being intentional about when and how we connect. This simple shift—opting for mindful separation during the week and deep connection once a month—has made us feel closer than ever.

So, if you’re stuck in the proximity loop without presence, consider scheduling your micro-disconnect. You might be surprised at how much reconnecting you actually need.